Thursday, 14 August 2014

Guest Review - Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
My friend, Ben is at it again! I mean the movie review. This time round, he is reviewing about the much talked about latest reboot of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.

Seeing is believing but hope your can get some hint from hint. Check out his review below :


If you live long enough, you will see your childhood memories being reboot back. Sometimes, like GI Joe and Garfield, it would be barely acceptable, while most of the times, like Transformer 4 and The Smurf, you would wish they leave those loving memories alone.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or TMNT as it was more commonly known as, was one such example. Those born in my era would instantly know which turtle bearing the name of an Renaissance artist wielded which type of Ninja weapon. And probably thanks to TMNT, we could name 4 Renaissance painters.

I have heard bad reviews on TMNT, hence watched with little expectation, that helped as the overall experiences weren't that bad as I would have imagine. TMNT 2014 is your atypical summer action movie, over used on CGI on a nonsensical plot. (Shredder looked exactly like a Transformer reject, saving cost perhaps)

Being a Michael Bay production, his trademarks were unmistakable. Everything is about explosion and effects, and little on plot and character development. On top of that, his style of fuck logic way of storytelling was all over the place.

How did shredder turn up on the top of building when moments ago he was fighting Raphael? 'coz fuck the logic.

Why would Sacks decide to deploy the weapon without even testing the mutagen he just collected? 'coz fuck the logic.

Splinter learned Ninjatsu through a book? 'coz fuck pretty much everything else

Another of Bay's trademark is his blatant product placement, guess which pizza store did the turtles have the pizza?

Throughout the movie, I was distracted by the female henchmen of the foot clans, she looked uncanny like our homegrown talented diva, Sun Ho, and I was hoping she would do a China wine twerk in the movie. 

I wished they had stick to the original backstory of Splinter being a actual sinsei and his freud with Shredder, here the backstory was completely different and it made no sense for Splinter knowing Shredder's plan and how the duo seemed to have an axe to grind when they finally met in the sewer.

In addition, how hard can that be to make the turtles and Splinter likable? Coming from the recent "Guardians of the Galaxy" which successfully made a walking tree and talking raccoon lovable, the turtles looked like lobos. worst certain shot the 4 turtles looked like giant penis heads surrounding April O'Neil, which was played by Megan Fox, a actress that's known by her curvatures than the actual acting.

Overall, go and see with little expectation. TMNT 2014 wasn't as bad the last TMNT movie but certainly not the better of, plus it was mercifully short, clocking in less than 2 hours screen time. 2 out of 5


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